Thoughts of a College Senior
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Monday, August 23, 2010
I forgot to mention a few things earlier that are on my mind not related to failing with talking to those two girls when that golden opportunity was presented to myself.
Last week I got a call from my friend Nick. He's getting married in April and he had a request for me to do something at his wedding. He wants me to work sound and all that because I am a tech guy, and he "wants me to be a part of the wedding in some way", as well as that "I wouldn't be forced to talk to anyone". I got issues with both statements. With the second one, does he think I am antisocial like that? And with the first one, what the fuck is up with that? I thought for sure that I would be part of the wedding party in some way. We've been friends for almost 13 years and even though we haven't talked a lot lately, I thought for sure we were good friends. I guess not good enough. It's just really annoying that for as long as we have known each other, he values my friendship enough to work fucking sound. I am definitely turning it down and I am not even sure I want to go to his wedding anymore. I mean, to be completely honest, I don't think their marriage will last. They have known each other for six months before they got engaged, and I just think they are too young, naieve, and poor to really make it. And it may sound immature on my end, but if I ever get married, I think that eliminates him from my wedding party. And it was a shame too, because he would have been in the mix for best man too.
Also, so many people have been bitching and moaning about a lot lately, and I don't see them doing a damn thing about it. Instead of whining and complaining about how your family life sucks, or that you are not getting paid enough in your job, or that your job sucks, go out and fucking do something about it. Honestly, hearing the same old thing all the time really gets old fast.
Current mood:  annoyed
Haven't updated in a while -- been really busy with life in general. Brief overview coming up.
Been really busy the past few weeks. Two weekends ago, Corey, Brian, Jesse, and Jess came into Kenosha and stayed at my place. We went to Six Flags and Chicago, which were both really fun. Few things to note about Chicago. Go to the Willis Tower and walk in the glass that extends out into the city. That is such an adrenaline rush. I sat on it and had my picture taken and wow I can't believe I did it. Also, Millenium Park is really cool. Oh, that Sunday I won $159 from the casino in Milwaukee. I did really well in Blackjack -- was up $40, but won most of my money when I had $3 on 26 in Roulette when it hit. Good times -- made up for missing work on Friday.
This past weekend was fun as well. Power hour was really rough for me but I survived it -- that was Friday night. Saturday was the Brewer game. I wore my Cubs jersey and got heckled the entire game. Our seats were at the very top, and every time I had to leave, I had to walk back up those stairs. And I got it pretty bad every time I did that. I expected it though, it was fun. Sunday was Six Flags (again). We did all the coasters, many of them twice. One thing: Superman in the front row = so amazing. Well worth the extended wait to sit in the front. Also, Dark Knight is really fun when you scream at every turn. Oh, and cheer for Harvey Dent when he comes on the screen. You'll get a great reaction from everyone around you. We won these octopus hats as well, and on the way home we got into a traffic congestion around Ryan Road. I was driving so I couldn't partake in this, but Jordan and Justin put on their hats, and Mark put on my hat, and they stuck their heads out of the windows and watched cars go by. We got so many great reactions and a few honks. It was so hilarious and funny. Like, cars would slow down next to us and talk. It was amazing.
Sunday night once I got back was a little depressing however. We stopped to get some food. We got back and I parked, and as we were walking down Prospect, some really cute girls were commenting on how much stuff they had to move in (I think that is what they were doing), and they commented on our hats asking us where we got them and such. As we were walking away, one of them mentioned if they should ask us for help moving the stuff. I almost walked back and offered help, but I figured I would go in, put my food down, change out of my wet clothes, and then go back out and offer to help. They were cute, and I figured it was an amazing opportunity. So I get back out, and they aren't there. I walk to my car, and on my way back I don't see them. I also don't see a lot of the stuff they had so I don't know how they got it all in. I think I missed a pretty good opportunity there to introduce myself (they live half a block away from us) and to maybe befriend them. Oh well, can't dwell on the past. Certainly does suck though...
But anyway, my little break is done, so it's back to work.
Current mood:  disappointed
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
So I feel terrible at the moment. I just need to get it out and here is where I do things like this. Today I was supposed to go shooting with my dad at his corporate cup event. Well, I was also gonna go to Dave and Buster's tonight with Jordan for half off games, and I didn't think I'd get back until around 8. So I told my dad, which I committed previously to, that something came up at work and I couldn't make it. Pretty much lied to him. I usually don't do that. I feel awful. I know he looks forward to whatever time he can spend with me. He gets so much shit from my spoiled rotten bitchy sisters and I'm sure my mom doesn't care as much as she should for him. It's just really bad and I feel god awful. I can't believe I'm doing it, there's just so much guilt in me at the moment. I believe in karma. In what goes around comes around. And I'm not earning favor points right now. But that's all my fault.
Now to something that has been pissing me off lately. People bitching about how rotten their lives are or about how everything seems to go wrong for them. Seriously, shut the hell up. Stop complaining about your life. If you don't like it so much, use the time you spend bitching to change what you don't like about your life. It frustrates me to no end when people whine and complain about every damn thing instead of appreciating what they do have in life. I'm coming to the point where I am just going to be direct with every little bitcher I come across. Some people make it seem that their life is one huge pile of shit. Right now I want to go slap every one of those people across the face and make them wake up.
Anyway now that's out, tonight I'm going to Dave and Buster's with a lot of guilt in me, but oh well. I made that choice and I can't back out of it now. I'm also planning for Chicago on Saturday. Corey, Jess, and Brian are coming down and we're going to Six Flags on Friday and Chicago on Saturday. I'm really pumped for both. It'll be nice to see them again.
Current mood:  calm
Friday, August 6, 2010
I am on my lunch break so I'll make a fast update. Milwaukee is awesome. My place is awesome. My neighborhood is really awesome. Being in the "student ghetto" is pretty cool, though it isn't as defined as Eau Claire's "student ghetto". I've basically been spending most of this week unpacking and getting everything situated. It's a process, but it's all coming together.
Anyway, in recent news, today I had a presentation at work. I did it alone today because the guy who is working on the project with me is on vacation. I didn't think I did all that well, but my manager said I did great. That made me feel better, even if he was lying.
Wednesday I was in a softball game with a bunch of people from work. A bunch of NM Infosys employees and some cricket players were there, so it was a USA vs India matchup. It was pretty cool, we had the national anthems played before the game and everything. USA won 19-9. I went 2-4 at the plate with 4 or 5 RBI's. I didn't hit the ball all that well, but my liners/ground balls found the holes and I was fortunate enough to bat with men on base. The two non-hits were hit to the pitcher, I beat one out on an error by the first baseman, and the other I was thrown out on. I played good in the field at second base. I almost misjudged one popup, but recovered to make a pretty good catch, though my throw to the plate wasn't in time to get the guy tagging from third. I fielded every grounder cleanly except for one, which I misplayed badly. It felt nice getting on the diamond again. My first time in a long time playing an organized game.
Anyway, time to get back to work.
Current mood:  awake
Saturday, July 31, 2010
Well I am almost all moved out. All I need to get out is a few more things and I should hopefully be all set. I'm pretty excited about it all. My place is absolutely awesome and I can't wait to be in Milwaukee.
Yesterday we signed the lease, but yesterday itself was full of so much fail. I woke up an hour and a half late at 7:30 because my alarm was set to 6:00pm. Doh. Fail 1. I get on the freeway and realize that I left my checkbook at home, so I needed to directly get my money. Fail 2. I call M&I to ask if I could authorize an ATM transaction for 1200 and she said that the ATM would probably not have that kind of money. Fail 3. I am paying for coffee at work, and the cute girl that works there asked me if I was doing anything this weekend, and we were talking, but some other people in line sort of nicely pushed me aside so they could check out. Fail 4. After work, I go to this M&I Bank on Prospect that Google told me about, which wasn't really an M&I at all. There was a bank there but it was only for the residents of the building, and there were a lot of older folk there, so I assume it was an elderly home. Fail 5. I ended up going to the bank on Water Street, but couldn't find a parking spot until I was about 5 blocks away from the bank. Fail 6. So yeah, yesterday wasn't great, but I'm not gonna complain about it. There are many people in the world that deserve to complain more than me.
I'm excited for everything to happen I only have $500 or so in my account right now but I'll be fine until I get paid on Thursday. My next major purchase will definitely be a computer, which I'm going to build. I'm hoping to have that all done by the end of August :-) But I gotta go and finish my packing, I'll probably update when I'm all moved into Milwaukee!
Current mood:  cheerful
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
Well I'm kind of bummed right now. I won't be moving to Milwaukee until the end of July. I couldn't get into their apartment, Kelsie's parents didn't feel comfortable having four people there. Apparently they're not supposed to have that many people living there, and their last roommate that moved out was a dumbass and their neighbors found out or whatever. What it all boils down to is that I won't be moving in with thim. Which really bums me out. I was hoping to be out of here by the weekend. Now I am staying here until the end of July. Like always, for me it's one step forward, two steps back. Nothing ever goes my way. Ever.
Current mood:  blah
Sunday, June 20, 2010
So my mom just told me that I'm going to be around for a couple more years. She said this when I was helping my sister with some computer related stuff, and that I would be around for a couple more years to help her out with stuff. I was like "couple years?" and she was like "yeah, why wouldn't you be?".
Ummmmmm. Not good. I'm waiting to hear back from Kelsie to make sure that everything is set or me to get into their place until I tell my parents. This is really, really bad. I already think I burned some bridges already with this decision, and now I'm probably going to burn more. I mean, deep down, I know this is the right decision for me. But the repurcussions could be bad. Very bad. *sigh* Nothing comes easy for me.
Current mood: blah
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
So decision time. Something was brought up tonight. An opportunity. I really want to take it, but I'm torn inside. Let me summarize what went down.
I was picked up at the Park N Ride by Jordan today and we went to work. After work, we picked up his friend Kala, dropped her off at her place, changed, and Jordan and I went disc golfing. He left his work shoes at her place, so we ended up going back to get them, and she had some food prepared, so we stayed, ate, and talked. There were two other guys there, one of them being a roommate and the other a friend. Shortly afterwards, Kelsie got back from work. More talking ensued, and the fact of me spending two hours driving each day came up. Here is where what I am talking about came up. Kala and Kelsie mentioned that they have a spare bedroom since their fourth roommate left and offered me to move in. I thought they were joking or that there had to be a catch. None of that was the case. I was slightly hesitant, and Kelsie said that she could probably talk to her parents (I think they are doing something with the rent) and possibly get it down to $250 a month. It would only be for a month or two anyway.
Here are the pros and cons.
Pros: I'm living on my own and moved out (well, not even close to entirely moved out for reasons stated in the cons). I am living with two girls, one of them who is very attractive and I have a slight crush on. I am very close to my work and don't have to wake up at 5:30 every morning. I am around more people who live my kind of lifestyle, and people I can generally have fun with (or so I think).
Cons: The room is very, very small. Very small, jail-cell like. They hijack wireless from other people's unprotected connections. And I don't think they have any TVs, and if they do, definitely no cable. And the big one, my parents WILL NOT LIKE THIS DECISION. Also, I would feel very bad for leaving since my parents (especially my mom) might take it as an insult.
That is it. I really, really want to go. I don't know how my parents will handle it. The thing is that they bought my new bow and helped me put a decent sum of money down on my car. I would feel bad doing this to them. I also don't think my dad would approve of me living in Milwaukee, even though it is the East Side which is a good area of the city. But man oh man do I want to take up this offer. The next two days will definitely involve me thinking this over pretty hard.
Current mood:  contemplative
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Tomorrow I start work! I'm super excited for it. The next step into the rest of my life. Moving out is next on my list. When I feel like I'm good to go, I'm out of here. Don't get me wrong, I love my family, and I really appreciate them letting me stay here, but I want my life to begin. I sort of feel as if I'm playing catch-up compared to my friends down here. Every one of my friends here are either engaged or pratically engaged, so it's an easy decision for them to stay home (which all of them are). But...I'm not even close to that. I don't want everyone I know to get married, and here I am still single and living at home with no direction in my life. I don't think I can solve that living at home. And I definitely do not think I can solve that in Kenosha. So I need to get out.
And about moving out...I've been doing a lot of thinking about that lately. In my mind, I know what I want to do, and I know what is the right decision for me, not anyone else. And thankfully, they are both the same.
Anyways, P90X has been going really good. I haven't been following the nutrition plan to a tee though, mainly in my protein intake. I ran out of lunchmeat so that hurts, and I can't really make many dinners where my main protein source would come from. So I've been drinking a ton of protein shakes (some of them double shakes). It's not ideal, but it works. This weekend kind of hurt me with my birthday/graduation celebrations with my family, but I think I'm good. Plyometrics is tomorrow...never looking forward to Plyo.
On the horizon, two weekends from now I'm going to Six Flags, the weekend after that is Summerfest, and the weekend after that I may be in Minnesota. So I'm getting booked this summer. I love it too.
God I can't wait for my life to begin, though I think I've mentioned that several times. Life here is so much different than it was in Eau Claire. Up there I had people to hang out with, people who wanted to do stuff. Here...I'm just sitting around not doing much. There's no place to really hang out at night, and everyone is always doing stuff. Like my friend Nick for example, I haven't seen him in a while, but every night he isn't working, he's with his fiancee, since they are apparently chained together. My friend Skip is always doing family things or spending time with his girlfriend (pratically fiancee). It's lonely down here -- another reason I want out.
But now I need to get some more stuff done before tomorrow.
Current mood:  excited
Monday, June 7, 2010
So Day 1 of P90X is completed, on Day 2 today. I didn't get everything I needed nutrition wise yesterday, but I got most of it. Today for breakfast I am having a ham and cheese sandwich with a protein shake. I'm not a huge fruit fan, so it's just water and protein powder. It doesn't taste bad, but it's kind of dry, and really watery. Maybe I shouldn't put so much water in next time. Plyometrics destroyed me today. I made it through the workout, but man I literally collapsed afterwards. The recovery drink formula came in today, and it tastes really good, and I can already tell it makes a difference.
Tomorrow and Wednesday I'm going to Cub/Brewer games. I'm really excited for them! Tailgating will be fun like normal, as well as the atmosphere of the games. Hopefully the Cubs take them both!
So I've been thinking of the whole situation with that girl Kelsie. And the more I've been thinking about it, the more I think it might get to her that I was attracted to her. The point being is that after we dropped the two off at their apartment, Jordan asked me if I did anything with Kelsie, mainly because I was standing behind her during this one band that was playing. I told her no I did not for the same reasons I mentioned in my earlier entry. Then he said "come on man, you know you want to date her". I could not lie, so with a smile I said "yes, you're right. I would definitely want to date her." I also mentioned to him that he was right when he said she was cute. Now with all that, and the fact that Jordan mentioned he wanted to hook us up (for some reason or another), there is a chance he could mention what I said to Kelsie's roommate Kala, which I think would definitely get to Kelsie. I'm not sure how I feel about that, but I would defintely be open to it happening. I always seem to have problems making that first move and getting by the initial flirting stages, so something like that happening could make stuff easier if she was interested. I suppose I'll have to wait and see how everything plays out.
Current mood: contemplative
Sunday, June 6, 2010
Yesterday was pretty cool. My grandparents came in for the morning to play cards, and after that I went up to Jordan's in Oak Creek. I was designated driver for the night (again, lol), so we used my car. We picked up his friend Alex and this other girl (forgot her name) and we all went disc golfing in this course around the Wauwatosa area. It was around 5 when we droped them off at their place, then Jordan, Gerrett, and I went to Jordan's friend Kala's place to pick her up. Gerrett gave Kala the name "pseudo-girlfriend" for Jordan. They're not officially dating, hence the pseudo part.
So we went to the NM parking structure to park for free since Jordan works there. We walked around a bit when we got there, and eventually met up with Kala's roommate Kelsie, who had an umbrella (which was awesome since it was raining). Apparently Jordan wanted to try and hook me up with her. He mentioned her Friday night at the pool bar we went to, and he said she was cute when I asked him about her. I took that with a grain of salt (since I know what he finds attractive when he has drinks in him), but he wasn't lying. She was really good looking. About a few inches shorter than me, dark-reddish hair, and a good personality (from what I saw). And he mentioned to me she was single, which to me is the green light. And as much as I really wanted to really get to know her, I decided not to last night. I don't regret not doing it either. My reasons were (A) it was raining and kind of cold, and we were all rather wet, and (B) it was at a concert. I'm sure I'll end up seeing her again, especially since I'm working with Jordan at NM, and he'll be around Kala a decent amount. So I decided to wait until a better environment. Whether this is the right move, who knows. But you never know if a move is right until it all plays out. By the way, Weezer was awesome. They closed out with Buddy Holly, which was amazing. They put on an amazing show, and it was a bummer the crowd wasn't as energetic as our group was (though we got some people around us going as well).
The walk back was pretty fun as well. The five of us broke out singing verses from random songs like Bad Romance and Poker Face, a few Weezer songs, and some others. We had everyone else walking around us laughing, a few of them even joined us. It was pretty awesome. So I took Kala and Kelsie back to their apartment, then I took Jordan and Gerrett back to Jordan's place, where we ended up playing Catan for the next hour and a half. It was good because I had my clothes drying. We finished around 2:15 amish, and I decided to leave and go home, so I got home around 2:45 am. Kelsie was on my mind for much of the way home. I can't wait for the next time I see her, hopefully it's in a better setting for me.
Today I am starting P90X...with the nutrition plan. Yes, the nutrition plan. That is going to be a bitch. I had some oatmeal for breakfast with a serving of the whey protein powder in it (it calls for a lot of protein initially to build muscle and shred fat). I only ended up eating half of it. It didn't taste bad, but wasn't good either. It's going to be rough initially.
Current mood:  anxious
Thursday, June 3, 2010
Well this is outstanding. Looks like my mom will not let me make my own food for the next few months. Why? Because it creates a mess. And I would obviously not do a good enough job cleaning up. So now I really do now know what to do. I just went out today and bought a shit load of stuff, and it looks like my mom has made all that irrelevant. I'm kinda pissed off right now about it. I can't wait until I get out of here. I seriously cannot wait to begin my life and not be restrained in this hell hole.
I know people say to take advantage of it while you can because it's free living. That is true and false. It's free in regards to money. However, it's not free with regards to my soul. I want my life to begin and I can't do that while I'm under my parent's watch. Last night I got home at midnight from Jordan's, and my dad lectured me on being responsible. I'm 22 years old dammit, almost 23. I don't need this. I want to be on my own again. That's what I'll miss most about college. Not having people telling me what I should and shouldn't do. Part of me sort of wishes I got a job elsewhere so I would be forced to go away. I dunno, I'm just really frustrated right now.
Current mood:  angry
Monday, May 31, 2010
So I've been wanting to start P90X and follow the nutrition plan. I plan to start this Sunday (so Saturday will be my off day), and I'm preparing the nutrition stuff now. It's really difficult setting this up, mainly because I'm living at home. I mean, I will be buying everything I need, but my mom hates me making messes, which she will claim I'll be doing. Also, I may not be able to eat what they prepare for the family. Dinner is the only real question mark, with perhaps lunch when I start working. But I want to start this and see what results I can really get from following the plan. Plus, I want to surprise people when I see them next. I also want to start feeling good about my self again, as well as get some more energy and not be tired so often. I really want to start it within the next day or so, but I want my off day to be on Saturday in case I have to go somewhere over the weekend (Saturday would be the prime off day).
I can't wait until I get out of this house so I can be free again.
Oh, been watching Band of Brothers all day today. It never gets old.
Current mood: cheerful
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
Well today was the Networks final. That was a rough one. Basically here's how it went. I saw the first one on routing tables, said "wtf" to myself, then went to the second problem. It looked complicated so I skipped that one too. The third one I threw down some BS, it was a Go Back 'N problem which I'm sure I did wrong. The fourth problem was a VCI table and was easy. The fifth one was a head scratcher, and was skipped, and the last problem was actually word for word on my cheat sheet. Score! But yeah I finished everything except the first problem, proceeded to stare at it for 30 minutes, then wrote down some garbage and handed it in. Even if I would have stared at it for the remainding 40 minutes, I would not have figured it out. In fact, I don't think I would have written anything on that problem. It was pretty rough.
So after the exam I got something to eat, returned some books to the bookstore with Jesse, then proceeded to study Oceanography. That final went okay. Not amazing, but okay. I honestly didn't care a whole lot -- my motivation is pretty much shot. Now I'm studying, or trying to study, Conservation of the Environment because my final is at 10 tomorrow morning. I'm going to Mug Club tonight with some people, which is probably not a good idea. There's a decent chance I'll be hungover taking the final tomorrow morning, but I'll live.
So with that girl, I think I would be good if I had one semester left. I honestly think that's all I really need. We were talking for a bit last night via text messages and today she was helping me study Oceanography for a bit (which actually helped out a ton). It's like, whenever I am talking to her, I feel happy. At times I wish I could get in her mind to know what she thinks. Maybe it's like what Erik said last weekend and she does "like" me. And maybe the reason why I think she couldn't is because I think she's too good for me. I know that's the wrong thought process to have, but it just always goes through my head. But maybe it is true that she does. I am picking up some signs that point towards it, but it's almost like I don't trust myself anymore. I really want to spend more time with her and hang out around her more, but my gut is telling me that's the wrong play here. So I'm going to listen my gut and continue whatever it is I'm doing. With graduation coming up and me no longer being in Eau Claire, I believe that's the best thing I can do. It's not like this will be the absolute last time of us seeing each other (she does live in the Milwaukee area, although interning in the Cities). This may or may not be the right move. Who knows, maybe if I were to ask her out the next time I see her, she would say yes. There is a chance, but I don't think that's the right play. I'll just play it out and whatever happens, happens. I'll just have to live with it. You might think I'm being stupid for this, and maybe I am. But unless I get a clear signal to move all my chips into the pot, I'm not going to commit.
Current mood:  confused
Sunday, May 16, 2010
My last weekend in Eau Claire was pretty fun. Jordan came up for the weekend, which was awesome. Friday was the CS/IS picnic. The dunk tank was really fun, I was able to dunk Professor Ernst twice, Adrienne once (should have been three times), and Jesse 5 times. It was just a really good time with everyone.
Friday night right after the picnic I went to happy hour at Brothers with Mike, Jordan, Alex Zdun, and Brett Jensen. We ended up playing a darts since they are free during happy hour. I was part of a rather interesting conversation with Erik (who we met there) about the girl I really like (I don't want to incorporate a name in this section). Apparently her name was brought up or whatever, and he said that she liked me. I said bullshit, because I honestly believe that, but he then said "No I'm serious. She likes you because you don't swarm around her like everyone else." I didn't press it any further, and maybe I should have pried him for information. He's worked on some projects with her so they do talk so maybe he knows something I don't. But then again, I really don't know what he meant by "like". If it's like as in friends then yes I believe that because we are friends, but like as in crush-type like, then I am kinda iffy on that. But who knows. I really wanted to talk to her a lot initially but I kept telling myself that was a mistake. Most every other guy in the major does that, so I thought it would just be pointless. So I decided not to sulk around her all the time and watch from the sidelines. I would talk to her every now and then but not all the time, and I wouldn't act as if I was attracted to her or anything like that. If what he said is true, then what I did apparently worked, but who knows. Obviously I do not have a lot of time to follow up on everything, which is rather unfortunate. But such is life.
Saturday morning I received a text from Adrienne asking for breakfast. Apparently she sent it to a few people but I was the only one who initially responded. She said that she was hungry and did not want to wait on everyone else, so the two of us went to the Nucleus on Water Street for breakfast. I had a really good time with her. I learned a lot more about her and we had a lot of good discussions. It made me feel very good. An hour afterwards I shot some hoops with Matt on one of the outdoor courts. I'm feeling much better about my shot and I'm learning a few moves, such as the crossover. I am going to buy a basketball once I get back and practice. My jump shot is coming around and I'm becoming more consitent with it, especially shooting off dribble. I've also improved on my free throws, which is also a weak part of my game. Afterwards Jordan and I played some disk golf -- I think I may get into that too once I graduate. After that I went to Olive Garden with Mike and Jordan -- Adrienne also joined us and I had a good time there. After that I played Settlers of Catan with Mike and Jordan, then we went to Water Street. I ended up joining with Jesse, Brian, Corey, and a couple others and we went to Brothers and then Buzzy's for some amazing Mac & Cheese pizza. All in all, this was a really good day.
This morning I went to breakfast with Jordan at the Blue Moon. And that's all I've basically done today. I've watched a lot of season 3 of 24. And that's it. Tomorrow I'm going to start studying for finals. I'm going to do my CS 370 take home exam and begin making my cheat sheet for Networks. I'm also really excited for the new 24 tomorrow night. All in all, a very good weekend.
Current mood: hopeful
Thursday, May 13, 2010
I had one of my best nights in Eau Claire tonight!!! I went to Mug Club at Brothers with some friends, and a little while into it, my friend Adam left. Well about 10-15 mintues later, he reappeared telling me that Chad Clifton and Nick Collins were at the Pickle. So I go there, thinking he's full of shit, and I don't see them. So I go back, tell him he's full of shit, and he goes with me to the Pickle. We are looking through the windows, and he see's Clifton there, and I freak out. So we go to the back, and we see Nick Collins pouring out shots. He bought them all, and I had one of them. I was so happy then, but it got better! Nick Collins went out back, and I ended up getting my picture taken with him with Adam Wasdovitch and Justin Burr! The picture will be up on Facebook when I get it! I am so excited now!!! This just made my entire college career! Getting a picture with an amazing Green Bay Packer with good friends in a college town!!! Man I will DEFINITELY miss Eau Claire!! Just goes to show you that even on a Wednesday night, stuff can happen!!!
Current mood: happy
Monday, May 10, 2010
Well the Networks demo is completely over now. Tan kind of owned us hardcore. Shiva did not work for some reason (I believe we forgot to ntohs or htons something). Stop & Wait worked perfectly on Clark->Andy. Go Back 'N worked for smaller window/packet sizes, and the same for Selective Repeat. I think I'm going to look at the code again and see why it wasn't running on Shiva. It's pissing me off because I spent a lot of time on it, and I tested it as well and it worked.
I'm also kind of pissed that Dr. Tan allowed Art's group an extra week to work on it. He did ask for the extension, but still...he is the sort of guy who is no excuses. He even said at the beginning of the semester that no extensions would be given. I mean, if we were given an extra week, everything would be working perfectly. So I'm kinda pissed about it.
But I don't really care, we passed and that's all I really care about. I just want to graduate. Now I have nothing until finals next week. I'm a tad depressed about it though. Like, I wish I would have put more time and effort into school and potentially go onto higher education. I was talking to Mike, and he said his three best moments were when Ernst said he was proud of him and his group for the Slashbot, when at a Career Fair Mike was talking to Cray and Ernst came to him and put his hand on his shoulder saying Mike was his best student, and when Mike told him he was accepted into grad school and Ernst shook his hand. It's moments like that which I am missing. It's sort of like knowing you should feel a sense of accomplishment, but it's just not there because you know there was so much more you could have done. I mean, I'm gonna get a degree from a UW school, made a ton of awesome friends, and found a good paying job. However, I just get the feeling that twenty years from now when I look back, I'll be sad that I did not do more.
Current mood: thoughtful
Sunday, May 9, 2010
Well tonight I had an amazing time out! Jesse and I went to the Grand Illusion and we had a pretty good time laughing at a lot of things and then went to Brothers and met with Andy, Adam, and Justin at Brothers. After an hour or so I met up with Megan (Pat's sister) and Mari, and they told me that Pat was here. Megan was being very firtly, actually, they both were, and it made me feel really good. I eventually met up with Pat, and I joined the group (after saying goodbye to my original group) and we went to She Nans. It was pretty crowded there, and we decided to go to the Brat because there were cheaper drinks there with the same type of dancing. I had a good time there. Afterwards I went to Buzzy's for some Mac & Cheese Pizza and went back to my dorm. I will seriously miss times like this when I graduate. None of my friends really go out, and Kenosha has nothing like Water Street. I will really miss this. These next two weeks will be some of the best of my life, and I will definitely live it up!!!
Current mood: happy
Thursday, May 6, 2010
Networks project is done. We'll see how the demo goes on Monday. The Cyberwar is also over with, and we got owned hard. We really didn't know how to attack, since all of the labs have been done when the network was closed and we could not see anything. It was a learn on the job thing, and it didn't go well. Oh well, I really don't care. I've stopped caring about a lot of school stuff right now. Though Networks class today was amazing. We spent an hour talking about random stuff...Tan told us stories about his days in the army, how he was trained by the Israelis, stuff like that. It was pretty awesome.
I'm contemplating whether I should go out tonight or stay inside and play some RE with Skip. I really want to go out, but then again, I really do not want to go out tonight. I dunno, gonna have to make the decision shortly.
Last night I had the sort of dreams you love and hate. They were all about that girl I've been talking about. The one I seem to be falling for more and more every time we talk, but I know it's basically a dream with graduation coming up and me no longer being in Eau Claire (that and my track record). Those dreams made me wake up mad. Mad in the way that I wish it would be real life. They affected me so much today that I was hoping I didn't see her today because I didn't want my heart to take over my body. Although she sent me a text during Human Geography asking me if I wanted to get food, and that made the class so much longer. I instantly become happy whenever I get a text from her -- she does that sort of thing to me. Receiving a text from her, no matter what it says, brightens my entire day. I kinda wish I knew her a year or two ago like I do now...maybe things could be different? I dunno...all I know is that I want my dreams to stop teasing me, but I don't want them to stop because they make me feel good.
Current mood: indifferent
Saturday, May 1, 2010
Well the Networks project is due Monday at 11:59pm, and we're still not done. We have most of the stuff done, we just need to get the error checking done and stress test. I might also try and persuade Jesse to do multiple file transfers. However I don't think we'll get multiple clients. If I'm feeling bold and ambitious, I might try it. But we'll see -- it'll depend on how well we do tomorrow. I got scared today for a bit. I added code to make different window sizes work for the sender and receiver, and it was working for me, but Jesse tried it after an hour or so and everything went to hell. He was saying the way I did it was wrong, and I kept telling him no. He tried to find out why I was wrong, but really couldn't prove it to me, and I found out that he didn't change one of our hardcoded values. It worked after that thank god. It made me scared because not even Stop & Wait would work with it!
I went out to Water Street on Thursday night for my roommate Matt's birthday. Michelle was pushing him to go out and eventually drew me, Jake, and Riley in as well. I didn't really want to go out, but I caved in. I don't have many of these left! And Matt NEVER goes out. I've asked him if he wanted to go out with me many times, but he never went. We ended up bar hoping, he spun the wheel at the Pickle first and then we went to Brothers. Something happened here that's worth noting. A really cute blonde was hitting on Riley. And by hitting, I mean she walked up to him, started a conversation, and bought him a drink. No offense to Riley, but he isn't the best looking guy in the world. But she saw something in him (maybe she was drunk...hopefully she was drunk). But after that, he came back to us. I went up to him, and was like "Riley, what is wrong with this picture? A hot girl buys you a drink and you come back to us?" I kept trying to push him towards her, but he would never go by her. She came up to him and danced with him for a bit, and was motioning him to come to her. I was pissed/jealous/happy for him at the same time. Why can't stuff like that just happen to me? We eventually went to Dooleys and then She Nan's. We walked out back, and as I passed the dance floor, I saw her on it. So I kinda convinced Riley to go up there. After about 5 minutes or so, I walked past the dance floor since I was going to the bar to get a drink and I saw him in a corner by himself. So I went up to him and told him to come with me for a shot. As the bartender was pouring a shot, she followed us and put her arounds around him. I was like "are you serious?" So I convinced Riley to go to the Pickle after her. He was out of money, so being the good wingman I am, I spotted him a 20. Needless to say, nothing really happened since he didn't find her. He blew it. We ended the night going to the Pioneer for quite a few shots and going to the Grand Illusion for a dice game, 7-14-21 (7 picks the shot, 14 buys the shot, 21 drinks the shot). We got back around 2ish. All in all, a good night. Though I'm still giving Riley a hard time about there. He was given the largest window a guy could ask for and didn't take it. He's kicking himself for not doing it either. I just wish it was me...even if nothing happened, it still would have made me feel good.
Not much else has been happening though. Have a Security presentation on Monday and Cyberwars Tuesday-Thursday. After that I'll have absolutely nothing to do, but that's not a bad thing! I will definitely be going out a lot for my last hurrah. I know once I get back home I won't be going out much, if at all. Most of my friends don't do that...in fact all of them don't, so I'm not quite sure how I'll adapt to that. It'll be sad not being walking distance away from the bars. It'll be sad not to be in a college town anymore. It'll be sad being boring and not going out on a Friday/Saturday night. It'll be sad having my parents ask me where I'm going whenever I leave. It'll be sad not being independent anymore. It'll be sad living at home. It'll be sad not being able to hang out with the clubhouse anymore. It'll be sad having to be "responsible". It'll be sad being in Kenosha where there is absolutely nothing to do (and after living in Eau Claire for 5 years, that is a FACT). It'll be sad having my nearby friends dwindle from more than 20 to about 2-3. It'll be sad not being able to make bad decisions anymore, like going out and getting drunk on a Thursday night with an 8am class the next morning (or...going out until 2:30am the night before a final exam). I will miss hanging out in the CS lab every day. I'm slowly realizing that my life will drastically change three weeks from now. I also wish that girls were easier to figure out. I feel like that's one thing I'm really missing now. At times I wonder how much bad karma must really have. I have other things I'd like to mention, but I think I'll save that for later.
And SGS is down, so no Networks for me! And I'm not depressed enough to go to Water Street by myself, so I guess I'm drinking in my room tonight.
Current mood: confused
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